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jisaac

this is pretty funny.

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paging Al Kyder... paging Al Kyder...

 

 

Even the clerk couldn't keep a straight face.

 

 

I do think it's odd though as they said no IDs were needed. I'm pretty sure thats not the case anymore, at least in the US that is.

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since you guys started it

 

Aaron Thetires (Air in the Tires)

Abe Rudder (Hey Brother)

Abbie Birthday (Happy Birthday)

Abel N. Willan (Able and Willing)

Achilles Punks (I'll Kill These Punks)

Adam Bomb (Atom Bomb)

Adam Meway (Out of My Way)

Adam Sapple (Adam's Apple)

Adolf Oliver Nippils (Ate Off All Of Her Nipples)

Al B. Zienya (I'll Be Seeing You)

Al DePantzeu (I'll De-Pants You)

Al Gore-Rythim (Algorithym)

Al Kaholic (Alcoholic)

Al Kaseltzer (Alkaseltzer)

Al Kickurass (I'll Kick Your Ass)

Al Killeu (I'll Kill You)

Al Luminum (Aluminum)

Al Nino (El Nino)

Al O'Moaney (Alimony)

Alpha Kenny Wun (I'll Fuck Anyone)

Alec Tricity (Electricity)

Alex Blaine Layder (I'll Explain Later)

Alf Abet (Alphabet)

Ali Gator (Ali Gator)

Allota Fagina (A lot of vagina) From the great movie Austin Powers!

Amanda B. Recandwithe (A Man to Be Reckoned With)

Amanda Lay (A Man To Lay)

Amanda Hugnkiss (A Man to Hug and Kiss)

Andy Gravity (Anti-Gravity)

Andy Structible (Indestructible)

Anita Bath (I Need A Bath)

Anita Hoare (I Need A **)

Ann B. Dextrous (Ambidextrous)

Ann Chovie (Anchovy)

Ann Tartica (Antartica)

Anna Linjection (Anal Injection)

Anna Mull (Animal)

Anna Rexiya (Anorexia)

Anne T. Lope (Antelope)

Annie Buddyhome (Anybody Home)

Annie Mah (Enema)

Ariel Hassle (A Real Hassle)

Artie Choke (Artichoke)

Aunty Biotic (Anti-Biotic)

Ayma Dommy (I'm A Dummy)

Ayma Moron (I'm a Moron)

 

***** B *****

 

Barb Dwyer (Barbed Wire)

Barb E. Cue (Barbecue)

Barry D'Alive (Buried Alive)

Barry D. Hatchett (Bury the Hatchett)

Barry Shmelly (Very Smelly)

Bart Ender (Bartender)

Bea O'Problem (B.O. Problem)

Bea Sting (Bee Sting)

Beau Vine (Bovine)

Ben Crobbery (Bank Robbery)

Ben Dover (Bend Over)

Ben O'Drill (Benadryl)

Ben Thair (Been There) See- "Don Thatt (Done That)"

Ben Lyon (Been lieing) I saw this one in the phone book!

Bess Twishes (Best Wishes)

Betty Bangzer (Bet He Bangs Her)

Betty Beatzer (Bet He Beats Her)

Betty Humpser (Bet He Humps Her)

Bill Board (Billboard)

Bill Ding (Building)

Bill Leeake (Belly Ache)

Bill Lowney (Bologna) See - Cole Kutz, Sal Ami, Sal Sage and Peppy Roni

Bjorn Free (Born Free)

Bo Nessround (Bonus Round)

Bob Frapples (Bob for Apples)

Bowen Arrow (Bow and Arrow)

Boyd Schidt (Bird ****)

Brice Tagg (Price Tag)

Brighton Early (Bright and Early)

Brook Lynn Bridge (Brooklyn Bridge)

Bud Weiser (Budweiser)

Burnedette Down (Burnt it Down)

Buster Cherry (Bust her Cherry)

Buster Hymen (Bust her Hymen)

 

 

***** C *****

 

Cal Culator (Calculator...duh)

Cal Efornia (California) - See "Neve Adda", "Elle Noise", "Louise E. Anna"

Cal Seeium (Calcium) - The name "Cal" basically goes with any word starting with "cal"

Candice B. DePlace (Can This Be The Place)

Candice B. Fureal (Can This Be For Real)

Carl Arm (Car Alarm)

Carlotta Tendant (Car Lot Attendant)

Carra S. Midown (Caress Me Down)

Carrie DeKoffin (Carry the Coffin)

Carrie Oakey (Karaoke)

Carson O. Gin (Carcinogen)

Casey Deeya (Quesadilla)

Casey Needzit (In Case He Needs It)

Chad Terbocks (Chatterbox)

Chanda Lear (Chandalear)

Chi Spurger (Cheeseburger)

Chris Ko (Crisco)

Chris Mass (Christmas)

Chris P. Nugget (Crispy Nugget)

Chuck Mysak (Chuck My Sack)

Chuck Roast (Hmmm...Chuck Roast?)

Claire DeAir (Clear the Air)

Clara Nett (Clarinet)

Clara Sabell (Clear as a Bell)

Claude N. Skretchem (Clawed and Scratched Them)

Clint Toris (Clitoris)

Cody Pendant (Co-Dependant)

Cole Kutz (Cold cuts) See - Bill Lowney, Sal Ami, Sal Sage and Peppy Roni

Colette A. Day

Colin Allcars (Calling all Cars)

Colleen Cardd (Calling Card)

Connie Lingus (Cunnilingus)

Craig Potz (Crackpots)

Craven Moorehead (Craving More Head) - Ok, so I finally put this one up!

Crystal Ball (Crystal Ball)

Curt N. Rodd (Curtain Rod)

Curt Zee (Curtsy)

Cy Burns (Sideburns)

Cy Kosis (Psychosis)

 

 

 

All Resources > Fun > FUNNY FORWARDS / FUN FORWARDS

 

send this page to a friend comments rate this

 

 

Funny Names D-J

listed by Jennifer

 

views: 4405 | rating: 5/10

 

 

 

 

***** D *****

 

Dale E. Bread (Daily Bread)

Dan D. Lyon (Dandelion)

Dan Druff (Dandruff)

Dan Geruss (Dangerous)

Dan Gleebitz (Dangly Bits)

Danielle Soloud (Don't Yell So Loud)

Darius Lesgettham (There He Is, Let's Get Him)

Darrell B. Moore (There'll be More)

Daryl Lect (Derelict)

Dawn Keebals (Donkey Balls)

Dee Capitated (Decapitated)

Dee Faced (Defaced)

Dee Sember (December)

Dennis Toffice (Dentist Office)

Denny Juan Heredatt (Did Anyone Hear That?) - Sent by my friend...Denny!

Des Buratto (Desperado)

Diane Toluvia (Dyin' to Love Ya)

Di O'Bolic (Diobolic)

Dick Cumoff (Dick Come Off) - A real name in a phone book!

Dick Gozinia (Dick Goes In Ya)

Dick Head (Uhhh...Dick Head)

Dick N. Cider (Dick Inside Her)

Dick Zucker (Dick Sucker...You Know Who You Are)

Dick Tater (Dictator)

Didi Reelydoit (Did He Really Do It?)

Dinah Sore (Dinosaur)

Doll R. Bill...(Dollar Bill)

Don Thatt (Done That) See "Ben Thair (Ben There)"

Doug Graves (Dug Graves)

Douglas S. Halfempty (The Glass is Half Empty)

Drew Blood (Drew Blood)

Drew Pea**** (Droopy ****)

Duane DeVane (Drain the Vain)

Dustin D. Furniture (Dusting the Furniture)

Dwayne Pipes (Drain Pipes)

Dylan Weed (Dealin' Weed)

 

 

***** E *****

 

Earl E. Byrd (Early Bird)

Ed Ible (Edible)

Ed Jewcation (Education)

Ed Venture (Adventure)

Eileen Dover (I Leaned Over)

Ella Vader (Elevator)

Elle O'Quent (Eloquent)

Ellie Noise (Illinois) - See "Cal Efornia", "Neve Vadda", "Louise E. Anna"

Ellis Dee (L.S.D)

Elmer Sklue (Elmer's Glue)

Emma Roids (Hemorrhoids)

Eric Shun (Erection)

Evan Lee Arps (Heavenly Harps)

Evans Gayte (Heavan's Gate)

Eve Hill (Evil)

Eve Ning (Evening)

Eve O'Lution (Evolution)

Ewan Whatarmy (You and What Army?)

 

 

***** F *****

 

Faye Kinnitt (Faking It)

Faye Slift (Face Lift)

Faye Tallity (Fatality)

Fletcher Bisceps (Flex Your Bisceps)

Frank Furter (Frankfurter)

Freida Convict (Free the Convict)

Frank N. Stein (Frankenstein)

 

 

***** G *****

 

Gabe Asher (Gay Basher)

Gabe Barr (Gay Bar)

Gene E. Yuss (Genius)

Gene Poole (Gene Pool)

Ginger Vitis (Gingervitis)

Gil T. Azell (Guilty as Hell)

Gladys Eeya (Glad to See Ya)

Gus Comzadia (Gas Comes Outta Ya)

Gus Tofwin (Gust of Wind)

 

 

***** H *****

 

Hal E. Luya (Hallelujah)

Hal Jalikakick (How'd ya like a kick)

Hammond Eggs (Ham and Eggs)

Hank E. Panky (Hanky Panky)

Harmon Ikka (Harmonica)

Harris Mint (Harassment)

Harrison Fire (Hair is on Fire)

Harry Balzac (Hairy Ball Sack)

Harry Weiner (Hairy Wiener)

Hayden Seek (Hide & Seek)

Haywood Jablowme (Hey, Would You Blow Me?)

Haywood Jashootmee (Hey Would You Shoot Me?)

Hein Noon (High Noon)

Helen Back (Hell and Back)

Helena Hanbaskett (Hell In A Hand Basket)

Henador Titzhoff (He Gnawed Her Tits Off) - A real name in an Austin, TX phonebook

Herbie Hind (Her Behind)

Herb E. Side (Herbiside)

Herb Eaverstinks (Her Beaver Stinks)

Herbie Voor (Herbivore)

Holden Mcgroin (Holding My Groin)

Holly Dayin (Holiday Inn) - See "Mary Ott (Marriot)" and "Moe Telsiks (Motel Six)"

Holly Wood (Hollywood)

Homan Provement (Home Improvent) And yes, I do know a guy named Homan!

Homer Sexual (Homosexual)

Howard I. No (How Would I Know?)

Howe D. Pardner (Howdy Partner)

Hu Flung Pu (Who Flung Poo?)

Huang Annsaw (Wrong Answer)

Hugh Beeotch (You ***)

Hugh deMann (You Da Man!)

Hugh G. Rection (Huge Erection)

Hugh Jass (Huge Ass)

Hugh Mungous (Humungous)

Hugo First (You Go First)

Hy Gene (Hygiene)

 

 

***** I *****

 

Ida Hoe (Idaho)

Ida Whana (I Don't Want to)

Igor Beaver (Eager Beaver)

Ilene Dover (I Leaned Over)

Ima B. Leever (I'm A Believer)

I.P. Freehly (I Pee Freely)

Ira Fuse (I Refuse)

I. Ron Stomach (Iron Stomach)

Ivana Humpalot (I Want to Hump A Lot) - From Austin Powers!

Ivan Itchinanus (I Hate an Itching Anus)

Ivana Kutchukokoff (I Wanna Cut Your **** Off)

Ivana Tinkle ( I Want to Tinkle)

Izzy Backyet (Is He Back Yet?)

Izzy Cumming (Is He Cumming)

 

 

***** J *****

 

Jack Dupp (Jacked Up)

Jack Koff (Jack Off)

Jack Meoff (Jack Me Off)

Jack Pot (Jackpot!)

Jacques Strap (Jock Strap)

Jan U. Wharry (January)

Jane Linkfence (Chainlink Fence)

Jaqueline Hyde (Jekyll and Hyde) - I saw this on some kids show (Very nice)

Jawana Die (Do Ya Wanna Die?)

Jay Walker (Uhhh...Jay Walker)

Jeanette Akenja-Nearing (Genetic Engineering)

Jed I. Knight (Jedi Knight)

Jeff Healitt (Did Ya Feel It?)

Jenny Tull (Genital)

Jerry Atrics (Geriatrics)

Jim Nasium (Gymnasium)

Joanna Hand (D'ya Want a Hand?)

Joe Czarfunee (Jokes Are Funny)

Joe King (Joking)

Jose Frayed (Who's Afraid)

Juan De Hattatime(One Day at a Time)

Juan Fortharoad (One For the Road)

Juan Nightstand (One Night Stant)

Juana Bea (Wanna-Be)

Justin Case (Just in Case)

Justin Credible (Just Incredible

 

 

***** K *****

 

Kareem O'Wheat (Cream of Wheat)

Kaye Ken Coffee (Cake and Coffee)

Kay Neine (Canine)

Kay O'Pectate (Kaopectate)

Ken Opener (Can Opener)

Kenitra Bush (Can I Eat Your Bush)

Kenny Dewitt (Can He Do It?)

Kenny Fakur (Can he Fuck her) - Naughty, naughty, naughty...

Kent Cook (Can't Cook)

Kim Payne Slogan (Campaign Slogan)

Kimmy Head (Give Me Head)

 

 

***** L *****

 

Lance Lyde (Landslide)

Laura Lynn Hardy (Laurel and Hardy)

Lee Keyrear (Leaky Rear)

Lee Nover (Lean Over)

Len DeHand (Lend a Hand)

Leo Tarred (Leotard)

Lily Livard (Lily Livered)

Lisa Neucar (Lease a New Car)

Liz Onnia (Lasagna)

Lou Briccant (Lubricant)

Lon Moore (Lawn Mower)

Luke Adam Go (Look at Him Go)

Lou Sirr (Loser)

Lou Stooth (Loose Tooth)

Louise E. Anna (Louisiana) - See "Cal Efornia", "Neve Vadda" "Elle Noise"

Lowden Clear (Loud and Clear)

Luke Atmyass (Look At My Ass)

Luna Tick (Lunatic)

Lyle Ike Adogg (Lie Like a Dog)

Lynn Guini (Linguini)

Lynn Meabuck (Lend Me a Buck)

 

 

***** M *****

 

Mabel Syrup (Maple Syrup)

Madame Crotch (My Damn Crotch)

Madka Owdiseez (Mad Cow Disease)

Manuel Labor (Manual labor) - This one is from a crank call, found HERE

Marcus Absent (Mark Us Absent)

Marge Innastraightline (March in a Straight Line)

Marion Money (Marrying Money)

Mark Mywords (Mark My Words)

Mark Z. Spot (Mark The Spot)

Marsha Dimes (March of Dimes)

Martha Fokker (Motherfucker)

Mary Christmas (Merry Christmas)

Mary Gold (Marigold)

Mary Juana (Marijuana)

Mary Ott (Marriot) - See "Holly Dayin (Holiday Inn)" and "Moe Telsiks"

Mary Thonn (Marathon)

Master Bates (Masturbates)

May I. Tutchem (May I Touch Them?)

May O'Nays (Mayonaise)

Max E. Mumm (Maximum)

Max E. Pad (Maxi Pad)

Megan Bacon (Makin' Bacon)

Mel Keetehts (Milky Tits)

Melissa Tothis (Ma, Listen to This)

Mel Practiss (Malpractice)

Michael Toris (My Clitoris)

Michelle Lynn (Michelin)

Midas Well (Might As Well...)

Mike Hunt (My ****) - I couldn't resist putting this up...

Mike Ockhurts (My **** Hurts)

Mike Ocksmall (My ****'s Small)

Mike Rohsopht (Microsoft)

Mike Rotchburns (My Crotch Burns) - Another one in this "Obscene Series"

Milly Meter (Millimeter)

Minnie Skurt (Miniskirt)

Miss Alanius (Miscellaneous)

Misty Meanor (Misdemeanor)

Mitch Again (Michigan)

Miya Buttreaks (My Butt Reaks)

Moe DeLawn (Moe the Lawn)

Moe Lester (Molester)

Moe Skeeto (Mosquito)

Moe Telsiks (Motel Six) - See "Holly Dayin (Holiday Inn)" and "Mary Ott (Marriot)"

Mort Tallity (Mortality)

Myra Maines (My Remains)

Mysha Long (My Shlong)

 

 

 

 

***** N *****

 

Nadia Seymour (Now do you see more?)

Nida Lyte (Need a Light)

Neil B. Formy (Kneel Before Me)

Neve Adda (Nevada) - See "Cal Efornia", "Elle Noise", "Louise E. Anna"

Nick L. Andime (Nickel and Dime)

Nick O'Teen (Nicotine)

Nick Ovtime (Nick Of Time)

 

 

***** O *****

 

Oliver Closeoff (All of her Clothes Off)

Ophelia Titzoff (I'll Feel Your Tits Off)

Opie Umsgood (Opium's Good)

Otto B. Kilt (Ought to be Killed)

Otto Whackew (Ought to Whack You)

 

 

***** P *****

 

Paige Turner (Page Turner)

Papa Boner (Pop a Boner)

Pat Myckok (Pat My ****)

Patty Meltt (Umm....Patty Melt)

Patty O'Furniture (Patio Furniture)

Pearl E. Gates(Pearly Gates)

Pearl E White (Pearly White)

Peppy Roni (Pepperoni) See - Cole Kutz, Sal Ami, Sal Sage, and Bill Lowney

Pete Zaria (Pizzeria)

Peter Pantz (Peed her pants)

Phil A. Delphia (Philadelphia)

Phil Atio (Fellatio)

Phil DeGrave (Fill the grave)

Phil Down (Feel Down)

Phil McCracken (Fill My Crack In)

Phil Myez (Feel My Ass)

Phil Mypockets (Fill my pockets)

Phillip McCrevice (Fill up my Crevice)

Phyllis Schlong (Feel his Shlong)

Polly Esther Pantts (Polyester Slacks)

Poppa Woody (Pop A Woody)

Pussy Galore (Well...What the hell do you think it means?!)

 

***** Q *****

 

Quimby Ingmeen (Quit Being Mean)

Quint S. Henschel (Quintessential)

Quinton Chingme (Quit Touching Me)

Quinton Plates (Contemplates) - Only thing I could think of...

 

 

***** R *****

 

Rachel DeScrimination (Racial Descrimination)

Ram Dass (Rammed Ass) - This is the actual name of an author of a story I read!

Ray N. Carnation (Reincarnation)

Ray Pugh (Rape You)

Renee Sance (Renaisance)

Richard Cranium (Well...another name for "Dick Head")

Rick Kleiner (Recliner)

Rick O'Shea (Ricochet)

Rip Tile (Reptile)

Rita Book (Read a Book)

Robin D.Craydle (Robbing the Cradle)

Robin Banks (Robbing Banks)

Robin Meeblind (Robbing Me Blind)

Ron A. Muck (Run Amuck)

Ruben My**** (Rubbing My ****) - Feel free to substitute My(Insert Anything Here)

Russell Ingleaves (Rustling Leaves)

 

 

***** S *****

 

Sadie Word (Say the Word)

Sal Ami (Salami) See - Cole Kutz, Bill Lowney, Sal Sage and Peppy Roni

Sal Sage (Sausage) See - Cole Kutz, Sal Ami, Bill Lowney and Peppy Roni

Sal T. Penuz (Salty Penis or Peanuts)

Sam Manilla (Salmonella)

Sam Pull (Sample)

Sam Dayoulpay (Some day you'll pay)

Sam Urai (Samurai)

Samson Night (Samsonite)

Sarah Doctorinthehouse (Is There a Doctor in the House) - Old Knock Knock joke!

Scott Shawn DeRocks (Scotch on the Rocks)

Seaman Sample (Semen Sample) - In the Navy.....

Seymour Butts (See more butts)

Sheeza Freak (She's a Freak)

Sheri Cola (Cherry Cola)

Sherman Wadd Evver (Sure Man, Whatever)

Shirley Knot (Surely not?)

Shirley U. Jest (Surely You Jest)

Sid Down (Sit Down)

Sir Fin Waves (Surfin' Waves)

Stacey Rhect (Stays Erect)

Stan Dup (Stand up)

Stu Padasso (Stupid Asshole)

Stu Pitt (Stupid)

Sue Case (Suitcase)

Sue E. Side (Suicide)

Sue Permann (Superman)

Sue Shi (Sushi) - One of my personal favorites...From The CranKings

Sue Ridge (Sewage)

Sue Yourazzof (Sue Your Ass Off)

 

 

***** T *****

 

Tanya Hyde (Tan Your Hide)

Tara Newhall (Tear a New Hole)

Tate Urchips (Tater Chips)

Ted E. Baer (Teddy Bear)

Telly Vision (Television)

Teresa Green (Trees are Green)

Tess Tickle (Testicle)

Tim Burr (Timber)

Tina See (Tennessee)

Titus Balsac (Tightest Ball Sack)

Torah Hyman (Tore a Hymen)

Ty Tannick (Titanic)

Ty Tass (Tight Ass)

Tyrone Shoes (Tie Your Own Shoes)

 

 

***** U *****

 

Ulee Daway (You Lead the Way)

U.P. Freehly (You Pee Freely)

 

 

***** V *****

 

Val Crow (Velcro)

Val Lay (Valet)

Val Veeta (Velveeta)

Vlad Tire (Flat Tire)

 

 

***** W *****

 

Walter Melon (Watermelon)

Warren Piece (War and Peace)

Wayne Deer (Reindeer)

Wayne Kerr (Wanker)

Willie Maykit (Will He Make It?)

Wilma Leggrowbach (Will My Leg Grow Back?)

Winnie Bago (Winnebago)

Winnie Dipoo (Winnie the Pooh)

Woody U. No (What Do You Know?)

 

 

***** X *****

 

Xavier Breath (Save Your Breath)

Xavier Money (Save Your Money)

 

 

***** Y *****

 

Yerma Wildo (Your Mom Will Do)

Yousuckmynuts N. Scratchm (You Suck My Nuts and Scratch Them) - Ummm.......

Yule B. Sari (You'll Be Sorry)

 

***** Z *****

 

Zeke N. Yeshallfind (Seek and You Shall Find)

Zelda Kowz (Sell the Cows)

Zoltan Pepper (Salt and Pepper)

 

just to name a few

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You don't need a photo ID to get your e-tickets from the machine. But you will need a photo ID that matches the e-ticket in order to pass the security checkpoints.

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ya you know what sucks for me?

is that either I or someone with the same name is on the terrorist watch list. And so everytime I fly (witch is quite alot) i cant check in online and I get pcked for the "random additional screening" everytime. I have to make sure to airport reeeeeeeel early.

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luckely i have not gotten the latex gloves thorough check. I always get my bags checks for the b word. (not going to say the word. not trying to keep my name on that list). Then I almost always get the body screening (stand in front of a sceen and extend my arms out so they can take a special picture.) And then some of the time i get the more thorough b detection where they get everything you have and check every seem.

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yeah they did that to me when i was travelling from LA to Florida .. thought it was because of my Bahamian passport though, at least thats what they told me .. cause I had a connecting flight from Florida to the Bahamas also.

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just get to the airport about 4 hours early. And make sure ALL your belongings are easily removable and can be shoved back in as easily as is was taken out without any regard to any order.

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